Gross thought of the day

Fair warning to Hubby and others with a sensitive stomach: even I can see this was a gross thought.

I just used my Ped Egg: you know, those foot file things? It is great, by the way. So I opened it up, afterwards, to dump out the little powdered foot pieces into the trash. And I thought, "Hmmm. I wonder if the dog would like this, sprinkled on his food?"

I didn't do it, ok? It was just a thought.

What is UP with Yahoo?

Lately, Yahoo has been a pain in my neck.

Mail shows up in my inbox long enough for me to see it, and then seconds later completely disappears. (So, hey, if you are waiting for a response from me I probably didn't get a chance to read your email)

Messenger skips stuff. As in, I'll write something and the other person never sees it. Or they do, and I never see it. But sometimes the missing text shows up in a transcript, if you print it out. What is THAT?

Several times a day, my "contacts" list disappears, so that I look like I have zero contacts. I live in terror that this will become a permanent situation and I'll lose all kinds of important people.

They'll tell me I have unread messages in my inbox, but...wait a minute or two before actually allowing those messages to show up IN my inbox.

Anybody know what is UP with these guys? Gah.

Guest bloggers? What a concept!

Penelope is on vacation this week and has solicited guest bloggers to carry her blog while she's gone. BRILLIANT! I love it!

And, coincidentally, Hubby and I are going to NYC for our 20th anniversary, next week. We'll be gone for 5 days, and while I realize that I am a total Internet junkie and completely incapable of abandoning my blog for that long (intentionally, anyway) the concept of guest bloggers DOES intrigue. Anyone wanna have a go? You could be Christine for a Day!

No sob story required, but obviously they were be accepted with joyful gratitude. Just lemme know...

Mad William's Oceanic Windows Have a Home

Very often, the total waste of time gang watches TV in my bedroom. I am a less than enthusiastic participant.

So, when I won half of Mad William's Oceanic Windows, I knew EXACTLY where I would put them.

THANK YOU, MAD WILLIAM! I love them.

Calling all Republicans: an Obama poll

This morning I read yet another article in which a Democrat claimed that race would be a factor in the Presidential race: the implication being that if Obama loses, it will be because people won't vote for him because he's black.

I hear this a lot, always coming from an Obama supporter.

But I have yet to meet a Republican who says they're planning to vote for McCain because he is white, or who lists Obama's race as a factor in their decision making process. I am pretty well convinced that this is just a bullshit argument. Heck, conservatives can find all kinds of reasons not to like Obama. It's not like we're all a bunch of racists, you know. We just disagree with him. Or dislike him. Or are terrified that Obama in the White House means terrorists in the streets of the US.

So, prove me wrong, Internet.

If you are going to vote McCain, or write in someone else's name (I'm talking to YOU, Richard!) or will be staying away from the polls on election day at least somewhat because Obama is partially of African descent, please email me, or comment anonymously here, and let me know. I'll post a tally (but no names or email addresses or blog links--not trying to start anything! really!) of those who say that Obama's race is a factor.

I realize this is completely unscientific. But...honestly. The whole thing seems ridiculous.

For Hubby, who hates soccer

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Awwwwww

Son #1 has worked all of 3 days. Today was his longest shift; after 7 hours he was so hungry he begged me to stop at Subway on the way home. Which we did.

And there, he bought his mom a soda. Out of his tip money.

Son #1 is adorable, OK?

Blues Jam--what next?

Blues Jam was last night. Fun as always, except...Wave, Mark and Cara are all moving away.

You heard me: WAVE IS LEAVING.


This is a crisis of epic proportions, both social and musical. But at least we all got hugs out of it.

On the bright side, Son #1 was back, playing well and having fun and subject to flirting by much older women.
Also good: we seem to have created a sort of Dance Craze. See me doing The Doug with, well, Doug, and Connie. Pardon my fatrolls. While they are magnificent, they are not the point of this photo.

I hate Sears AND Roebucks

Well, not entirely. But I hate that their crappy repair system means I have been without a washer for weeks on end.

Two nights ago, Son #3 and Son #4 fought over a shirt. Basically the last clean shirt that either one can fit in that is not meant for winter.

Yesterday, Son #1 borrowed boxers from Hubby, so he could go to work.

Last night, after cleaning out the gutters and trimming hedges, I fell asleep in my yard cleaning gear in part because I knew the sheets were already stank and also in part because I only have Fredericks of Hollywood gear left, for night.

Today, I am taking it all to the laundromat because THIS IS RIDONCULOUS. We need clothes.

So here it is: note that it is attempting to swallow my coffee table and the electric piano. With some success.

Here, also, is a photo of it inside my minivan. The minivan we purchased because it had more passenger space than any other car we could find. Yeah. See? I wasn't kidding. Lots of laundry.



UPDATE: I spent 4.5 hours in the laundromat, Thursday afternoon. That comes to 37 loads of laundry. Between loading machines and unloading them and folding stuff and all that, I spent all of 20 minutes sitting still. Between that, and spin class, and a night of dancing at the Country Store, I am a bit on the sore side, this morning. But at least my living room is no longer under attack.

4 random sentences

Stolen from Shamelessly Sassy:

I am a crappy communicator, even though I do it for money; actually, I think that is WHY I do it for money.

The Sons have a friend over to spend the night; everyone in the family has a crush on Guitar Boy.

If I use a curling iron, I can delay getting a haircut for a very long time.

I buy pink stuff so the boys won't lose it for me.

So get out of town, Salsa Personalities. That's your warning.

You Are Barbeque Sauce

You are a social person. You enjoy cooking for other people. You are both skillful and competitive. You enjoy mastering hard tasks. You appreciate complexity more than simplicity. Your taste in food tends to lean toward interesting flavors. You appreciate exotic spice combinations. You tend to like cutting edge, fusion cuisine. You get along with all personalities from a distance. Except salsa personalities, who always seem to annoy you.

What Condiment Are You?

I STILL can't serve a beverage correctly

Not long ago, Son #4 declared that we needed juice glasses. The glasses we had in the cabinet were too large for juice.

My arguments that, firstly, any glass from which you drink juice becomes a juice glass, and secondly, that nothing prevents you from pouring a small amount of juice into a tall glass, were met with extreme eye-rolling and sighs.

A couple of weeks ago, I was at the thrift store and found several juice glasses. Cute ones, too-green glass with little flowers on the side. So I bought them, and put them in the cabinet.

Son #4 just drank something. And what did he say?

"You know what I really don't like? Green glasses. They make everything look green."

I. Give. Up.

Poky Redhead Says I'm Girly.

The basket of lip products, the constant manicures, the collection of heels. Perhaps she is right, and I have managed to save a vestige of femininity in this boy's dorm of a house.

Here, for your viewing pleasure, is my entire collection of nail care products. I am giving myself a quicky French manicure tonight, because I hate busted nails.

REALLY sorry

"Mom, I'm sorry I drank your tea."

"That's OK, Son #2, I don't mind if you have some."

"No, Mom, I'm REALLY sorry. That was the bitterest, most horrible stuff I have ever had. I don't know how you can drink it."

23

That's how many loads of laundry I did at the laundromat today. They are now at home, drying in our dryer. Because, well, $47.50 was enough for laundry, as far as I was concerned. And we HAVE a working dryer...

One of THOSE days

I am a stay-at-home-mom. That means I clean and read to my children and bake cookies, right?

Actually, today I did not do any of that.

From 9am to noon, I fought by fax, phone and email to get:
--repairs expedited for my washer
--a rental washer until the repairs are done
--insurance coverage for several covered expenses about which the insurance people are being jerks
--service on our gutters, which the gutter service people say are "not clogged" although we watch water sheet over them during every rainfall

I only left my desk long enough to throw a heap of beach towels on the basement bathroom floor, when the toilet overflowed.

I then took a shower, made my daily frozen mocha, and ran errands:
Blockbuster return (I liked The Darjeeling Limited. Hubby was less enthused)
Bank transfers
Oriental Market to buy shrimp chips (yes, they are worth a trip)
Chamber of Commerce to pick up a copy of the book I worked on in May and June
Dropped Son #1 off at a job interview, and picked him up
Picked up Hubby's dry cleaned jacket
Dropped off the recycling
Dropped off a bag at the thrift store and shopped while I was there
Hit the post office to return some Lands' End purchases
Ran by the opthalmologist's office, hoping he could help me renew my driver's license by mail (can't, but maybe that is a blessing, as my old license photo is horrific)

Got home with just a few sips of mocha left in my cup. Took off the lid and found---the blade to my blender. It is dead. So, looks like I will be shopping for a new blender. I think we are going to invest in a Vita-Mix, because everyone swears they last forever.

But first, I have an article to write. And chicken to fry...

Holy Moly, a Repair Miracle

"Someone from our service department will be out to look at your washer between 8 and 5, Monday."

You know what THAT means. Around 11, I would get a call saying they were "on their way" from the far end of the state. They would be here in about 3 hours, except they have to stop for lunch. So, you know, around 5:15 they would show up.

Not today.

It is 8:27 a.m. Jimmy from Sears has been in my basement for about 15 minutes, already. I can actually see the possibility of clean laundry TODAY.

Which is good, because our toilet just overflowed, so I used about 4 beach towels to soak it all up.

Update: Naturally, the part he needs is not on his truck. We have to wait until the 16th for a return visit. Ah, the laundromat. My new home away from home...

A to Z, stolen from Penelope

Accent: Maryland. My husband says I sound like a hick.

Breakfast or no breakfast: Breakfast, please.

Chore I don’t care for: Anything I have to do because some kid made a mess.

Dog or Cat: Cat. Please.

Essential Electronics: Laptop, cell phone, NUVI! I love my nuvi!

Favorite Cologne: Don't really have one. I grab something from my basket and...there it is.

Gold or Silver: Gold, usually.

Handbag I carry most often: Is just a purse. I don't care. But it does have cool slots for my cell phone and stuff.

Insomnia: Not so bad, of late. I just barrel-roll through it.

Job Title: Mom. And freelance writer. And assistant to the wedding photographer.

Kids: 4 Sons. 16, 14, 13, 12. Yeah, I know. They are CLOSE.

Living Arrangements: Live with Hubby, the Sons, 2 cats and that idiot dog.

Most Admirable Trait: Patient. This is also my worst trait.

Naughtiest Childhood Behaviour: In a fit of jealousy, I broke Stevie Wilsey's arrows. Stevie, I am still sorry. Really sorry. I think that was the first time I ever wished I was a boy, and you bore the brunt of it.

Overnight hospital stays: Childbirth, and that time that they thought I was miscarrying (but I didn't)

Phobias: Anything that could harm my kids. Which generally means "large bodies of water"

Quote: The future belongs to those with the courage to act. Not sure where that came from.

Reason to smile: Going out tonight!

Siblings: Sister. 4 years younger, and unlike me in every way.

Time I wake up: Lately, whenever I feel like it. 6:30, maybe?

Unusual Talent or Skill: Can't think of any.

Vegetable I Refuse to Eat: Can't think of any. I can choke down most veggies.

Worst Habit: stewing, instead of taking action

X-rays: yup. Just like everyone.

Yummy Stuff: hummus. tea. frozen mocha. Indian, Thai, or Mexican food. Aw, heck, I like most stuff. But not oysters.

Zoo Animal I Like Most: Tigers.

Happy Independence Day, folks!

July 4th is my favorite holiday, I think. Even this year, which is starting to look like it is going to be fireworks-free, due to rain.

So, hey, Happy Independence Day to all the rest of us Americans. I love it here, and missed it something fierce when I lived abroad.

Why are Hershey bars so thin?

..so that men can just slide them under the bedroom door, when their women are in the throes of "I am just going to spend the next few days moping. Give me chocolate and step out of the way."

I can flash-fry a buffalo in 30 seconds

Hubby and I had to get a new stove--the old one had disintegrated. Thankfully, Hubby is a Guy, so he got all into researching stove technology. We now have an induction stove. It ROCKS. It is like cooking on gas, in Thailand. Even our son's 15 year old friend commented, last night, that seeing it boil water in 2 minutes, 40 seconds, was "tight"...but then again, maybe Guitar Boy is just being nice to the old people...

Uncharacteristically Shoppy

I took today off.

For most of you, that means you stayed home from work, right? But since I am 95% Stay At Home Mom and 5% Freelance Writer Who Works in the Living Room, home is not a place to relax. It is a place to look around and fret about all the stuff I have not yet accomplished. So, today, I zigged when I would have zagged. I went to the Mall.

Yeah, ME. Christine. I actually did. Had a great time, too.

--Nice, long drive both ways. I love driving.
--I smelled everything in Yankee Candle, and bought one.
--I had a long conversation with the woman at Victoria's Secret. What is it about those women? They love to talk. And I bought some stuff. Ooh, baby.
--Unfortunately, I also got waxed. Which normally would be no big deal, or even pretty cool, from a New Lingerie perspective. But today I am covered in bruises. Who knew? So, you know, a little bit less "ooh, baby" than I might have been.
TMI Update: For those who asked, I am bruised because next week is The Most Wonderful Time of the Month. Apparently, that is not a good time to have a bikini waxing done, because, well, duh, you are full of blood down there.
--I took my external flash in for repair, with just 6 days to spare on the warrantee. Hubby's record keeping ROCKS!
--Had a long conversation with the woman selling Dead Sea Salt beauty products, while she exfoliated my hands. That stuff is awesome.
--Sat in a midrange restaurant and picked at a delicious salad while chugging iced tea and not telling boys to get their elbows off the table. Ahhh....thinking entire thoughts, to conclusion, and no one there to ask for my croutons.
--I roamed a couple of department stores, just for fun. Didn't have to buy anything, didn't have to round up the kids.

All in all, it was AWESOME.

I think maybe I will do that one again.